Never Eat Alone includes some tips on how to network, which is a skill that we should all use.
So join us for the next 10 minutes as we reveal Keith Ferrazzi's and Tahl Raz's secrets, including how he's never discovered in a back lunch booth with no one to talk to!
Getting the Right Mind-Set
Here's the catch: success in any profession (but especially in business) is about collaborating with others rather than competing with them.
People are the ones that drive and decide the success of a business. We rely on one another and feel compelled to assist one another.
We've all been asked to social gatherings. Card ninjas who play top trumps with the other attendees frequent those after-work meetings.
Ferrazzi believes that true networking is figuring out how to help others succeed. It's about putting forth the effort to give more than we receive.
Genuine networking is also beneficial to the company. Building relationships is advantageous to the organizations for which we work since everyone benefits from our personal development - it's our value that makes people want to connect with us.
In a word, giving is the secret to success. And here's Ferrazzi's addendum: We must be willing to receive charity in a big way. We frequently have to go out and ask for it.
He believes that we are only working half the equation until we are willing to seek help to provide it.
Because the mutual need is recognized, a network can function. There's an unspoken agreement that putting time and effort into cultivating personal relationships with the appropriate individuals will pay off.
However, it must be profitable in both directions: a win-win situation. Any other way, it's a binary situation. There is just one winner and one loser in this game. So take the initiative and seek help.
We formerly found kindness and loyalty in our employers; we now had to look for it in a web of our own connections. It's a more personal form of devotion and generosity, directed at our coworkers, team, friends, and customers.
In difficult circumstances, neither experience nor hard work, nor skill will save us. If we need a job, money, guidance, assistance, hope, or a way to make a sale, there's only one place we can turn: our extended network of friends and acquaintances.
So, before we seek help, we must first determine what we desire.
According to Ferrazzi, the more precise we are about what we want to do, the easier it is to design a strategy to get there. Part of that strategy is building relationships with the individuals who can help us get there.
Here's his three-step method for figuring out what we desire.
Step One: Find Our Passion
The majority of individuals do not. Rather than taking the time to figure out what they want to accomplish, they accept what they "should" be doing.
Nonetheless, every one of us has an intuitive sense of what we desire most in life. All we have to do now is look for it.
We must search within, free of limitations, uncertainties, anxieties, and expectations about what we "should" be doing. We must be able to overcome barriers such as time, money, and commitment.
We need to go outside: ask those closest to us what they believe are our greatest strengths and shortcomings.
Step Two: Putting Goals to Paper
Ferrazzi recommends that we adopt a three-part Relationship Action Plan.
The first section is devoted to creating goals that will aid in the accomplishment of our aim.
The second section ties those objectives to the people, places, and things that will aid in completing the task.
The third section aids in determining the most effective method of contacting those who can assist us in achieving our objectives.
Step Three: Create a Personal "Board of Advisors"
Finally, even the best-laid plans benefit from outside assistance. It helps to have an informed counselor, or two or three, who can serve as both a cheerleader and an eagle-eyed supervisor, holding us accountable.
Build It Before We Need It
Ferrazzi reminds that those with the biggest network of connections, mentors, and friends understand the need to reach out to others well before they require assistance.
The most essential thing is to get to know your contacts as friends rather than as future clients. Building a connection is a gradual process: one tiny step at a time.
According to Ferrazzi, there are great chances all around us to form relationships with individuals we know, who know people we don't know, and who, in turn, know even more people.
As a result, the first stage in building our relationship network is concentrating on our personal circle of friends and family.
Without a doubt, they will know someone who may be the missing link.
When it comes to creating connections, those fearful must remember that the worst thing someone can say is "no."
We must have the "courage" to confront our fears. To assist, look for a role model and watch their actions. Pay attention to what they're doing and, over time, adopt some of their strategies. We'll gradually get the guts to reach out on our own.
The Key Skills needed within our toolbox.
Nothing should be left to chance. Who we meet, how we meet, and the meeting's goal should all be planned ahead of time.
Find out more about who they are and what they do. Find out what matters to them, such as their interests, difficulties, and objectives. With this understanding, we may enter their environment and converse intelligently. Ferrazzi assures us that their gratitude would be palpable.
#2 Take Names
It is critical to successfully organize and manage the information that allows connections to thrive.
Tracking the people we know, the people we want to know, and doing all the homework that will help us build meaningful relationships with others may be exhausting. As a result, put up a functional system to note individuals you wish to learn more about.
#3 Warm the Cold Call
Ferrazzi offers four guidelines for conducting successful cold calls:
1) Establish credibility by naming a well-known person or organization.
2) Explain your value proposition.
3) Create a sense of urgency by being willing to do whatever it takes, whenever it takes, to meet the other person on their own terms.
4) Be willing to make a compromise that ensures a minimum of certain follow-ups.
#4 Managing the Gatekeeper, artfully
What is the best way to open the door? To begin, turn the gatekeeper into a friend rather than a foe. And avoid getting on their bad side at all costs. Treat them with the respect they deserve.
If we do, even the most powerful decision-makers will be able to enter. Thank them for their assistance. Thank them with a phone call, flowers, or a handwritten letter.
#5 Never Eat Alone
Invisibility, according to Ferrazzi, is a fate even worse than failure. It implies we should always reach out to people, whether it's during breakfast, lunch, or dinner.
It means that if one meeting doesn't go as planned, we'll have six more lined up for the remainder of the week. He recommends that we fill our social and event calendars to the brim.
To be visible and active within our ever-expanding network of friends and connections, we must put in a lot of effort.
#6 Share Our Passions
When it comes to meeting new people, it's not just about who we meet, but also about how and where we encounter them.
According to Ferrazzi, common interests are the fundamental building blocks of any relationship.
He claims that what matters is what we do together, not how often we meet. It's contagious when we're genuinely passionate about something.
Others are drawn to who we are and what we care about because of our enthusiasm. Others react by lowering their guard. That is why it is critical in business to share our enthusiasm.
#7 Follow Up or Fail
When we meet someone with whom we want to connect, we must go above and beyond to ensure that we are not forgotten. Most individuals, in fact, don't follow up very effectively, if at all.
We should begin the process of ensuring that a new friend remembers our name (and the positive impression we've made) as soon as we meet them. Remember, it's not about what they can do for us, but about what we can do for them. It's all about providing them a cause to contact you again.
#8 Connect with Connectors
We all know at least one person who appears to know everyone and who appears to know everyone. These people, according to Ferrazzi, should be the foundations of every thriving network.
They serve as a crossroads for a variety of networks. Simply said, the most effective method to expand and maximize the potential of our circle of friends is to connect it with someone else's.
#9 The Art of Small Talk
We've all experienced the terror of stepping into a room full of complete strangers and having nothing to say.
Small talk is crucial in this situation—it is a talent that can be learned. Like any other talent, it can be discovered if we have the drive and the right information. The aim is simple:
- Initiate a conversation.
- Maintain it.
- Establish a relationship.
- Leave the other person thinking, "I like that person."
#10 Be Unique.
Differentiation is the name of the game when it comes to establishing an impact. Shatter expectations. Shake things up a little.
Vulnerability, according to Ferrazzi, is one of the most undervalued assets in business today. Being yourself is all it takes to be charming. Our strength comes from our individuality.
And there you have it: some of the best ideas from Keith Ferrazzi's intriguing book Never Eat Alone.